Lockdown – Day 60 ish
I was listening to Russell Brand this morning. I could listen to him all day – it doesn’t really matter what he’s yacking on about. Anyone that witty, intelligent and self deprecating deserves, at least, his own cult – I’m serious, I’d join. Anyhoo, Russ (I feel I can not only call him by his first name but to shorten it too) was waxing lyrical about life but my take away was that he said (this is not verbatim) if you think you look at your phone too much turn it off. Due to my writing and being on lockdown I have spent a considerable amount of time on one device or another and I am aware of the unease within me at doing so. Unfortunately I was also watching said podcast on my phone so although I agreed with the sentiment I was in a pickle as I felt I should then turn it off. He had not finished his soliloquy though so I, guilty, carried on watching.
Life is so full of contradictions and, with children, this is highlighted all the more.
How do I teach my daughter to be kind to everyone but also to not allow people to take advantage of her benevolence?
We shouldn’t judge others but people will judge you so try to make sure people like you but always be yourself.
Don’t judge but if someone is coming at you with a knife, be judgey: do run and do call the police – yes he may have had a terrible childhood but he still should be in prison…
Be yourself and be honest but don’t offend anyone because that’s not kind.
Exercise and watch what you eat but don’t worry about your weight or how you look because it’s ok to be overweight and not exercise if that’s what you want.
You Tube yoga lady is very fond of saying “let go of everything that no longer serves you” but that’s not very holistic is it? Does that mean let bad thoughts wash over you like you’ve inhaled half a kilo of weed or bollocks to everyone and everything that’s not useful.
Life is all about balance. Yin / Yang: Two halves that together complete a whole. This Yin and yangness is also a starting point for change. When something is whole, by definition, it’s unchanging as it is complete. As I understand it the yin is peace and wisdom and yang is courage and ambitious – overdose on one or the other and you’re in danger of becoming a feckless dolt or a manic psychotic.
Being in lockdown with my kith n kin has knocked my equilibrium out of kilter slightly and it’s taken me a while to figure out what it is. It’s guilt. We have all day to fill and yet I always feel like I should be doing something constructive. I need to allow myself more Yin.
Anyhoooo, today was an excellent day. With the loosening of lockdown rules we ventured out to the garden centre and gorged ourselves on all manner of plants. I then spent 2 hours doing my ma’s garden, came home and repeated the procedure in our own. Today I had purpose. My 1 hour of yoga felt … well, it felt earned. So did my bag of giant Wotsits. Yin and Yang.
My Mid Life Review* was supposed to be a gentle meandering stroll around what, after 49 years, I am. To take stock. Lockdown has though thrown me headlong up a steeper learning curve than I had planned. It’s all good though.
*See blogs 1-3 if you need to catch up.